Welcome back to my blog this week! Telling my story was, and still is, hard to do. I’ve gotten so many words of encouragement and support from old friends and it’s been great reconnecting after so many years!
It’s hard to write this blog without sounding like I’m complaining about everything, but so many struggle with depression and all the effects covid has on life that I want to share my story in hopes of helping someone get through their situation.
A great quote I always try to remember is “Every day might not be good, but there’s something good in every day.” This is so true! Not every day is going to be good, and emotionally I’ve been all over the place. My mom has spent most of the last 2 weeks in the hospital, I’ve struggled with depression this week, I’ve felt like I’m not enough and can’t get anything right, and I’ve struggled with feeling like a disappointment most of the time, every single day.
I’m a terrible over thinker, and I know that I have to stay focused on the positive, and that I have to fight those negative thoughts I have about myself. I do know how lucky I am and how blessed I am to be here. I’m incredibly grateful that I have this second chance, and I work every day to make the most of this opportunity.
Yes, I lost my focus on growing my business. Yes, I spent time binge watching Law and Order:SVU. (Actually, I’m ok with that! I started from Season 1 Ep 1 back before I left Dallas and I’m STILL only at Season 12 of 23!) What I have to remind myself is that I’m human, and I have a lot to deal with right now. But I know that to succeed, I have to stop the negative self-talk in my mind, and stop being so hard on myself.
I have to keep sight of the good that happened. I filled several new orders and got to see an old friend I haven’t seen in 30 years! I had a blast testing fragrances for my new fall collection! I found some things in storage that I’ve been looking for! I am walking more each week, becoming stronger and more coordinated! I got to laugh and learn new things, and spend time with people important to me.
Not every day was a good day, but there was definitely something good in every day.